Tuesday, 21 August 2012

Like Flies Around Shit

Today has been an awakening of sorts. A day in which I have probably changed as a person, probably for the better, but also probably for the worst. I have realised that society isn't based upon hard work, or passion, or talent, or even the ability to be on time. It is built on being a top draw cunt, or at least eating the arsehole of one.
It started off as a regular shit six o'clock in my shit life at the moment (or as my mate Jim puts it 'In this vicious circle...') I turned up for my shift to be hassled by managers and abused by customers like every other day.
However, this day was slightly different in the sense that the Regional Manager was in. The hassle was stepped up to the maximum, the fucking annoying cretin Foods Manager was on my case like I was lazy, like I didn't care. The truth of it is, no; I don't care, I used to, but not now. He tried to get me to step up my speed by bombarding me with statistics, corporate spin, and fucking buzz words like 'productivity'. In fact I am yet to meet somebody who has actually cared about the fact that they are supposed to work at 80 trays an hour. We work as quick as we can and it takes as long as it takes.Anyway we got there in the end, and I was perched on a till to watch a man, who can possibly be described as looking like a Walrus, strode into the food hall, followed by his sniveling cronies, the Management. They all huddled around him laughing at every joke, nodding at every statement, like vultures around a carcass, like customers around the reduced aisle, like flies around shit.
Shit is a perfect way to describe the Regional Manager of the popular high street chain, as if it wasn't for his policy, I might well be staying. However, at this particular company, if you get 100% on the mystery tests of your work (called a Mystery Shop, which I believe to be morally wrong as it is a dishonest and totally subjective test of skills by somebody who doesn't fully understand the consequences of their actions.) you do not get a reward, handshake, or barely a thank you, you get a condescending and awkward "Cheers, now get on with your work." However, if you fail to reach 100%, be it because of a busy or rushed time, you get slapped with a written warning (known as a Misconduct) which stays on your record for two years and is the equivalent to telling a manager to fuck off, which I may as well have done and got my money's worth. That's top positive management, because people are always going to do their best work living in fear of losing their jobs. Now I realise that there may be something in my contract that states I shouldn't be airing my views in a public forum, however I don't believe that my contract is worth the paper it is written on.
According to directgov.org.uk, the government's official employment website it states:

If your employer wants to change your contract If your employer wants to make changes, they should
  • consult you or your representative (for example, a trade union official)
  • explain the reasons why
  • listen to alternative ideas
  • This can be found by following this link. Yet this company deems it acceptable and correct to change your contracted hours without prior consultation, in the hope that you won't find out. It happened to me.
    However, it gave me a wry smile when an innocent old lady looked to the group of 4 managers for help, and was ignored by every single one of them. Ah setting the perfect example, but yet not one befitting of a misconduct surprisingly.
    It frankly sickens me that in order for some people to get on they need to act in this way. I never want to be like this, I have caught myself doing it in the past and cut it out, immediately. I respect and enjoy the company of people I actually like, so I feel sorry for the lonely lives that people lead if they feel it necessary to impress a man befitting of a walrus.
    Also to cap my frustration and anger I have come home to be accused of showing a lack of commitment to a project that I was doing as a favour and was sold to me as a quick job, but since has had a a ton of layers added to it. Nothing of which I am interested in or passionate about.
    So I have made a change, from this day forward, I only do favours if I am being paid or it benefits me. Gone are the days of 'helping out' friends and family. Gone are the days of me doing things because I am nice. I am leaving this world of stress and ultimate misery that I have gotten off the back of working hard and trying to make the best of things. Usually the best of the bottom of the barrel.
    I once got given a really terrible group of campers to look after when I worked at a Summer Camp, and I was told I got them, because I could be trusted and that I was good. I didn't feel rewarded, I felt angered. Yet I watched someone who openly didn't care about his job get a nice cool bunch of kids.
    Its a shame really because the world might be losing a really nice person. Not charitable, but decent.
    Yet this proves to me above all else that what I am doing is not the way to move forward in life, I need to become awful and disgusting to be around. I need to become a shit, and then the flies might flock to me.

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